Thursday, 3 January 2013

A new beginning

“Three weeks from now, I will be harvesting my crops. Imagine where you will be, and it will be so. Hold the line! Stay with me! If you find yourself alone, riding in the green fields with the sun on your face, do not be troubled. For you are in Elysium, and you're already dead!” – Maximus (Gladiator, 2000)

Elysium was where the gods sent you after you died, if you were righteous and heroic. There you would spend your days in much the same way that you did in life. Only it was a blessed existence, one in which only happiness existed and where sorrow was only a word. You did not have to toil so hard, the weather was always good, and sweet fruits could be harvested three times a year. It was paradise after death.
But there is another Elysium. It is not a place beneath the earth and it is not for the dead. It is a state, right here on Earth. It is a condition of the mind. It is perfect bliss. Some say it exists only in the imagination. Perhaps they are right. Maximus said, “Imagine where you will be, and it will be so.” And so I close my eyes and try to imagine my Elysium... and nothing comes to mind.
 I can’t remember the last time I was happy. I took an online test for depression yesterday, and it told me that I had a “high risk” of major depression and a “high risk” of dysthymia. Granted, these online tests are not actual doctors, but I do feel that it came out right. Hell, I am tired of feeling this way. I think I might actually talk to someone about this. It’s time to take control of my life. It’s time to find my place of happiness, my Elysium.
And so I have started this blog. Writing is something that I have always enjoyed and have only recently returned to. The blog is not going to be about depression. I am not going to whine about all the things that are wrong with my life. I do hope to write about many things; books, movies, television, video games, history and life. I figure if I write about the things that make me happy, I could somehow make myself feel better.
With that, I end my first post. May you walk a shining path in this new year and reach your own Elysium. I’ll be rooting for you. J

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